Carnegie - How to Win Friends and Influence concepts
Key Points
References
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Key Concepts
how-to-win-friends-w_paum66.pdf
1. Fundamental techniques in handling people.
2. Ways to make people like you.
3. How to win people to your way of thinking.
4. How to change people without giving or arousing resentment.
basic communications
1. Don’t criticise, condemn or complain << how can we do better?
2. Give honest and sincere appreciation
3. Arouse in the other person an eager want. << open questions then fbr validations
be understanding, honest, focused, respectful 7 Cs,
let others come up with the ideas to a problem
get people to like you
focus on their interests, history, feelings
listen, ask open questions, follow up
be interested in them
smile
how can I help?
keys to conversations ...
Here’s how Carnegie recommends you do that:
1. The only way to get the best out of an argument is to avoid it.
2. Show respect for the other person’s opinions.
3. If you are wrong, admit it.
4. Begin in a friendly way.
5. Get the other person saying “yes, yes!”
6. Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
7. Let the other person feel that an idea is theirs.
8. Try to see things from their point of view.
9. Be sympathetic to their opinions and desires.
10. Appeal to the nobler motives.
11. Dramatise your ideas.
12. Throw down a challenge.
for a tough discussion, try talking about someone else's situation on that topic first
make it their idea
add supporting evidence
add a challenge for us
BE A LEADER: HOW TO CHANGE PEOPLE
The 9 key principles he covers are:
1. Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
2. Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly.
3. Talk about your own mistakes before criticising other people.
4. Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
5. Let the other person save face.
6. Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement.
7. Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
8. Use encouragement, make faults seem easy to correct.
9. Make the other person feel happy about doing the thing you suggested.
Key Takeaways
- It’s important to try and understand other people, what makes them tick.
- Try to see things from other people’s perspective. Put yourself in their
shoes.
- Always be honest and upfront.
- Learn how to be a good listener.
- Avoid arguments at all costs.
- Accept that people may have different opinions to you.
- Accept and acknowledge your own mistakes
- Encouragement and praise are essential in getting people to do things for
you.
- Don’t give orders, instead ask questions.
- Never embarrass someone else, let them keep their pride intact.
Potential Value Opportunities
Potential Challenges
Candidate Solutions
Step-by-step guide for Example
sample code block